Let's Charge Him With Fucking The Kids!

What exactly is the point of this front page CNN story? At first glance, doesn't it appear that the latest "American al Qaeda" has been caught and is being fitted for the flagpole the government plans to run his ass up? Of course, if you actually read to the end of the blurb, it says the guy is not in custody and his whereabouts are unknown. (Note: After a lead-in like that, I opted not to read the story. Fuck CNN.)

I'm sure it's only a matter of time, however. We've all observed how great the US Government is at capturing these al Qaeda leaders. I look back on that bin Laden trial with such feeling of ... oh, wait, never mind.

Since we don't have the guy in custody, and we're basically just making shit up for propoganda purposes anyway, why stop at announcing a charge of treason? This is all hypothetical, right? How about we add arson to the list? I'll bet this cocksucker is sweating now! Let's add breaking and entering. Oh hot shit! I'll see your B&E, and raise you conspiracy, assult and battery, and grand theft auto. Lastly, let's nail him for beastiality and IM'ing government pages. After all, if we're just making shit up, shouldn't it at least be compelling?

What would you like to charge the American al Qaeda with? Any thoughts?

*-This post should not in any way be confused with an attempt by the author to push an agenda or products. Wanna buy some candy?